Latest Blog Posts

Childless Voices Resound on IVF’s 40th Anniversary

The experience of not being able to have children when you wanted them will always be life altering.  And it has the capacity to inflict a level of grief that is, among other things, transformative.

The experience of wanting children and not being able to have them does not always have to be so inhumane, however.

What do we do when evolution is so clearly needed?  When we are driven by the common thread of leaving this experience more truthful and less pulverizing than we found it?  One doesn’t need to have their own children to have a vested interest in improving things for the next generation, that’s for sure.

We start talking. (more…)

Co – Participation

Actively engaging in the childless not by choice experience

“Do you have time to talk in person?  I have to ask you something.  Can’t really explain it via text.”

That piece of me that’s always waiting for the other shoe to drop, that piece of me cultivated and well primed by multiple failed fertility treatments and four years of actively trying to conceive, still lives on.  Duller and more in the shadows now, but still there.

I quickly made the time for my dear childhood friend, preparing myself for the intense at the very least.   (more…)

Read the Flipping Chart, Please

 Image result for paperwork images

The medical profession’s tone deafness surrounding infertility and involuntary childlessness

On the Thursday before this past Sunday, the day that shall not be named here in the US, it finally came.

Considering the fact I’m living as, among other things, a childless not by choice survivor of infertility, I had had a relatively trigger free week.  I went food shopping twice (a newly regained ability since coming down with post infection dysautonomia almost a year and a half ago) and no one wished me happy mother’s day.  I ran into a neighbor while getting my groceries out of the car and she didn’t mention the looming national holiday.  Making up for my winter of hibernation, I went out twice – once grabbing lunch with a friend and another having dinner with my husband and two friends of ours.  Nary a peep.  And aside from the usual commercial bombardment, which seemed to be making me only mildly grumpy and was not spiking my sarcasm meter to the degree it usually does, I was actually starting to feel like this is my world too once again.  

Now, I want to be clear, it’s not like I was just skipping through my week.  Four years out of trying to conceive and four years into the grieving and healing process, there are still many times when I wish I could emblazon myself with a “fragile, please handle with care” stamp.  The week leading into mother’s day is of course one of them.  Sensing my wounds and vulnerabilities undulating just beneath my now quasi functional surface, I attempted to make the necessary adjustments.   (more…)

My Yoga Class Posts Tomorrow at 9:00 EST

A reminder my We Are Worthy Summit Yoga Class is posting tomorrow at 9:00 am EST and will be available for viewing after that as well. Hope you can carve out the time to practice with me!

Here’s the event description:

Join Sarah Chamberlin, writer of the blog Infertility Honesty, as she leads us through a basic yoga class.

The practice of yoga can aid in enhancing the health of the mind, body and soul.  Stepping “onto your mat” affords opportunities for self care, self connection, and exploring the art of being.  Add to that the benefits of practicing with an instructor and a community (albeit a virtual one!) who have walked in your shoes.

Interlaced with the theme of worthiness, this alignment based class is open to all levels and will highlight basic yoga poses and practices.  Pose modifications and alternatives will be offered.

Items needed are:

A basic sticky yoga mat (or, a non slippery surface to practice on)

Two or three folded blankets, non slippery and rough in texture

Two yoga blocks (or, two similar sized VERY sturdy shoeboxes)

See you on April 28th!

Hope you’ve been able to get something out of the summit this week.  I’ve enjoyed a couple of live events and will be catching up on the rest as I can.  You can check out the rest of Saturday’s events here.

We Are Worthy Online Summit Next Week

Greetings everyone!

Hope you can join me and some other great presenters next week, from April 22 – April 28 for the We Are Worthy Summit.  

The summit is being organized by Nicci and Andrew Fletcher of the Childless Not By Choice Magazine, and Brandi Lytle of Notsomommy.com.

It’s a week long event featuring live webinars, pre-recorded trainings, live chats and panel discussions, including a basic yoga class led by yours truly on Saturday the 28th.

Everything is free (yay!), however hop on over to their SITE and check out the program of events as some do require pre-registration.

The week is going to be chock full of topics relevant to our community – everything from dealing with motherhood loss and grief, to writing, self care and of course my personal all time favorite topics – coping with a child centric world, disenfranchised grief and fielding the timeless (and clueless) why don’t you just adopt and have you thought of trying IVF questions.  So in other words, it’s time to party.

Finally it looks like the script has been flipped and we have a week that addresses our needs and realities.  Hope to “see” you there!

An Easter Note to Self

Pulling into the parking lot, we were overcome by an unanticipated wave of families with young children.  Someone decollapsed and snapped into position a twin stroller as I got out of my car.  On my right, as I walked into the garden center, a set of grandparents were suspended in time, gazing oozingly at their grandchild before re-entering their vehicle.

It was Good Friday, and Holy Shit indeed.   (more…)