It’s pop culture time. (And it also happens to be a snow day here in parts of the north-east. I haven’t heard complete reports, but I’m hoping my childhood stomping grounds of suburban Bean Town finally got spared).
Yes, there are other angles of the child free not by choice platform that are undoubtedly more substantive. The weightier issues of those who don’t parent are many. However it’s nice to hear someone speaking my language, even if but in the form of entertainment that’s not meant to be taken too seriously. Therefore I’d like to give a lighthearted nod to two gloriously unapologetic female celebrities with sound minds and big mouths, one a parent and one not, who actually make sense (even amid a world that on many days no longer does to me).
Comedy is often just the right salve for struggle and angst, but I’m not about to risk seeing a comedienne who might launch into the woes of parenting. Main problem being that I’m not able to consider them woes in the first place. So it was just the perfect thing that, five days before my actual birthday, Kathy Griffin performed at a venue fifteen minutes from my house. And in many ways Griffin delivered. Not only did she give a long (almost two hour) show and held back nothing, her act is trigger free for those of us who can’t have children, and generally very “non-parent appropriate”.
10) She has a special entitled “Everybody Can Suck It”. In my opinion, this is the best title for anything ever. Come to think of it, if I ever change my name that would be in the running. Sarah is just so……normal. (Just think, anytime I hold out my hand and introduce myself, I’ll get to say it……”Everybody can suck it, nice to meet you” That would be so awesome).
9) In this day and age of women old enough to be grandmothers giving birth, she has a special entitled “Kathy Griffin: 50 and NOT Pregnant”. Some may consider this rude, I consider it a social service in the form of a much needed reality check.
Although on the surface she comes across as bitter and not too deep, in actuality KG does a fine job mocking those things that our culture tends to over worship…..such as parenthood for example.
7) “There are SOME places you just shouldn’t bring a baby” she was so bold as to say in this mommy obsessed world (in reference to Kimye bringing one year old baby North South East West or whatever to a fashion show).
6) Of course I love her chastising of parents with non infants as well: “My friends with kids are sooo annoying when they all say “Kathy, you don’t have kids, you JUST don’t understand…..he’s GIFTED.”
5) And, with dripping sarcasm to the whole audience: “All of you with kids out there, Yeah, I know, I know your kid’s a genius…….I get it, I really do.”
4) She makes fun of the Duggars
3) She makes fun of the Duggars by making the not so crazy point that one person likely can’t be a good mom to NINETEEN kids.
2) She makes fun of the Duggars by speculating as to the appearance of Mrs. Duggar’s private parts after delivering 19 children. Too lewd for me to even quote. Her comment was inappropriate, distasteful, and crossed the line…….so naturally it was my FAVORITE part of the show.
1) Did I mention she makes fun of the Duggars?*
My take on the Duggars: Though not crazy about their pro breeding representation, I was initially willing to give the Duggars a pass. If what they do works for them and they are able to pay for it, then aren’t there more useful things to be complaining about in this world? Deep down I’m a live and let live kind of person. Plus, that they could get nineteen kids while many of us get none is proof of the ultimate shit show of absurdities that is human reproduction. So from that angle I actually liked their existence since in a strange way The Duggars = my point exactly.
However. Given their anti-human being political agenda that is anti-choice, anti-LGBTQ, anti-science and anti-sanity, among other things, I pulled all of my open-minded cards off the table. My live and let live feeling only applies to those who are so appropriate as to wish others the same, not to those who are so ridiculous as to think their way is actually better than someone else’s. In the end I say let ‘em have it, Griffin!
And I can’t sign off without giving a nod to Judge Judy (my husband’s favorite). Though a mother to five kids herself, she never seems to let people with children play the parent empathy card in her courtroom. I’m almost tempted to call her unguarded disdain for irresponsible parenting a significant contribution to society, especially in this culture that prizes baby bumps and the mere title of parent over good parenting amid at least an attempt at financial and social stability.
As I was on the couch often during my one surgery and ten failed fertility treatments, she’d sometimes be the catalyst for the only laugh of my day, whether with a
Plaintiff: But, I’m a Mom, I’ve got two kids at home……(translation: I’ve got different rights than non moms…)
Judge Judy: I DON’T CARE!!!
Defendant: I’ve got four kids, though…… (translation: I don’t have to be as responsible as those who don’t….)
Judge Judy: Well that’s YOUR FAULT!!!
So in the spirit of pop culture banter that’s got it right, I leave you with the best Judge Judy exchange ever, one that will likely resonate with those of us who know all too well the gender of a child doesn’t matter one iota:
JJ: How old are you??
JJ: How many kids do you have?
JJ: Good grief. How many jobs do you have?
JJ: Well GOOD! That’ll hopefully keep you busy enough so your number of kids will stay at 6!!
D: (smirking) Well, I was going to try for another boy……
JJ (practically yelling) Hey, listen to me……THAT’S STUPID!!!!!!
Newsflash: The New York Metropolitan Area might be taking its first actual pause EVER. Businesses and schools are closed as a most sublime (though very slippery for those trying to travel) snow falls over the area. A snow that is considerably easier to enjoy as most believe this one will be our last. Starting Sunday, a long-awaited run of forty degree days is expected to start making a dent in what is an extreme amount of snow and ice cover for this time of year that has been on the ground since the second half of January. So for now, most people seem to be releasing into the moment. Case in point, my snow day lunch: Olives, parmesan cheese, and a glass of Cabernet. Say no more.